What a whirlwind the last couple of weeks have been – working on articles and various details for the launch of 5 Minutes for Special Needs between posting on my own blog, going to work, taking care of my husband and son, handling ongoing transportation problems and getting ready for a family vacation that started the day before the site went live! Despite the continual itch to sneak away and visit the wifi hotspot during our vacation, we had a wonderful time with each other and my husband’s family.
One of the highlights of the trip was going to a horse riding place where the younger kids had pony rides while the older kids and some of the adults went for a trail ride. As the guide, Matt, helped my son onto his horse, I mentioned that he has autism and may not always answer when spoken to. Matt’s response was to ask me to join them, so of course my first thought was that he was worried about how my son would behave and didn’t want to be alone with him in case there was a problem. But it turned out that he actually wanted to talk to me.
As we walked along the path, he told me about about a child who has come into his life who has Asperger Syndrome. At the stable they have a horse, named Elvis, who was rescued from an abusive situation, and he wasn’t sure if they would ever be able to use him with guests. This boy has really taken to Elvis, however, and the horse has responded by being very gentle around him. From this experience, Matt has looked into the use of horses as therapy with children and adults who have various disabilities and is now planning to become certified for therapeutic horseback riding.
I never know what the response will be when I tell someone that my son has autism, although I am amazed at the number of times the person will begin sharing their concerns about a niece or nephew, a grandchild, or even their own son or daughter. This encounter, however, was such an encouragement to me. Although we hear stories every day of kids who are ostracized or damaged in some way by the people in their lives, here is a guy who had an experience and has responded by looking for a way that he can make a difference in the lives of others. All I can say is, “Way to go, Matt!”
So what’s the best reaction you have gotten to your child’s disability? Please leave a comment and share it with us.
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The best resaction I probably have had was in the post I wrote a few days ago called, “Is Your Dog Autistic?”. A wonderful smile and a feeling of acceptance. It was great.
Some of the worst are the questioning looks and the weery nods where nothing is said and M is looked up and down like she is from another planet. Since she has no certain “look” of have special needs some people won’t believe that she is Autistic and will actually try and debate me on the point.
Saying things like, “She seems perfectly normal to me.” As if I asked for their opinion or diagnosis. It is weird. I am sure they are trying to be nice or something but it just not necessary.
It is especially unnerving when it is a doctor at the emergency room or some “professional”. Once a doctor at the ER said,”Hmmm…are you sure she has a chromosome disorder? She does not look like she does.” I about fell off the chair. Duh. Yeah, the six grand worth of testing and testing results were quite accurate. I find professionals are often the worst.
Since we are often in the ER for her CVS having to tell her diagnosis every time is beyond exhausting because we always get comments.
I am wearing such a big smile. I love these moments and giving hearts like Matt’s.
I think perhaps the times no disabilities were noted are pretty good. Like when we’re in a restaurant and someone stops by our table to say, “You’re boys are so handsome and so well-mannered (or behaved)”.
Uh-huh…it can happen.
This story is absolutely heart warming. My sister is mentally retarded. She is the oldest of four. Growing up, I can’t tell you how many unfavorable (to say the least) responses we got. I remember a time when the short bus pulled right up next to my bus. All the kids were laughing and making fun of the passengers on the short bus. One glance was all it took to see my sister sitting there among the butt of such cruelty. I too say “Way to go Matt!”
Marla, I enjoyed that post and am so thankful when someone just accepts my son and interacts with him at his level.
Melody, what a great experience for any mom!
Tiffanie, thanks for sharing about your sister. Hopefully we can teach our children to be more understanding and compassionate of others and improve things for the next generation.