Down Syndrome Barbie

Very difficult area [especially as I am not a Barbie fan] That said I remember my daughter being given her first 'baby' doll when I was pregnant with the next child.

'Baby' doll did not fare well in our household, luckily, but my daughter did a lot better with the real thing when he finally arrived.

Best wishes

Oooooo this is a good one! Hmmm, my son has cerebral palsy. Would I want someone to give him a doll that looked just like him? The accessories could be a red and black wheelchair, an IV pump for night feeds, and his own suction machine (or that could be sold separately). The doll would come with a little insurance card and tiny little Pediasure cans. It would be nice to see that great curly blonde hair of his and his contagious smile in doll form, but if I’m perfectly honest I don’t think I’d like the doll.

Too much reality I think.

Man, I loved this question!

If my child wanted the doll (and it didn't look like the Barbie ideal) I would buy it. I buy books that depict characters with T21 and I am delighted when I see advertisements that include children with T21, so I would be happy to have a doll that resembled Joe. I would not, however, give anyone a doll (of any kind) as a gift unless they specifically asked for it. That is because the politics of representation are so personal I wouldn't presume that the parents would share my position. Part of the reason I abhor Barbie is that she sets an unattainable standard of beauty that no one can match. Also, she is forced to stand on her toes all the time, ready for high heels.

Great question!

Vince would be thrilled to have a doll, I am guessing Santa is brining one this year. But I am thinking I wouldn't get a DS one. I do not know why? I am assuming because I do not see him as any different thanVince, so a ds doll for me would kind of remind me about it. Which would be fine, but not imortant.

hahaha. do I make sense?

When I was a very young child, my parents gave me a "black" doll (I am caucasian) (must have been one of the first, back in the early 1950's), so that I would feel comfortable around all sorts of different people. But I didn't think I was black!
But when you have a doll with the purpose of "being like you", I think that it is very limiting , and also emphasizes the "try to be like Barbie" idea. I may have wished to be thin like Barbie (I wasn't), but in most of my play with Barbie, I had her doing all sorts of things no one can do. She flew around (wonder-woman style), and did a lot of good deads.
So I would not use such a doll. DS is part of my daughter's makeup, but she is much more than that.
Books are different, because some will have a DS character, and some won't. So in the end they are all people. So if I did get such a Barbie, I would buy several different types to go around.
Also, if one DOES buy such a doll, the chances of another kid saying that doll is ugly is quite big greater, I think, than a child saying the same about them), and I am not sure I want that viewpoint going into Ricki's memory.

Lily loves baby dolls. She has some that are so realistic looking that people have run over to help Lily carry them!
Lily got a doll w/Ds for Christmas a few years ago. She opened the box, grabbed her out, looked into her face and said "it's me!" Lily just kept looking at her and holding her.
I have two statues that are children with Down syndrome, one girl, one boy. I know the individuals they were modeled after. I have given these statues to people who have lost their child with Down syndrome and I gave them to each of Lily's grandmas for Mother's Day.
I would buy another doll, but I am picky. I don't want the tongue sticking out, because Lily and most younger kids I know don't do that anymore because of the therapy they have received to keep their tongues in.

This IS a great question! I really enjoy your posts, Kim, and how they challenge me to think.
I'm an SLP-in-training, and I would not be adverse to having such a doll in my toy cabinet. However, I would definitely discuss using the doll with the primary caregiver before bringing it out. I wouldn't want to offend anyone, or make them uncomfortable.

To have had a doll with Down syndrome features among the dolls we had in our house would have been ok with me, but the only one I saw at the time was a cloth doll that had blue lines on the face to look like creases near the eyes–I did not like it and didn't think it looked anything like a child with Down syndrome–I thought it was ugly. My kids' other dolls had pleasant facial expressions, that one looked angry. I could not buy it.

If I had found a doll similar in style to my daughters' other dolls (more like an American girl doll, less like raggedy ann) with the addition of Down syndrome features I would probably have bought it. I liked the idea of a different doll, but not of what struck me as a lesser doll.

Dolls are weirdly superficial anyway–they really are only what they look like, there is no getting to know them and finding out how truly wonderful they are… Barbies aim for glamour, but most dolls should be pretty neutral–blank slates for imagination to fill up…

A a child (and a teenager and an adult) I so wanted to be different than I was. I would not have wanted a *Carole* doll. I loved books because they took me to places where my imagination could run wild. Dolls are make-believe, they are fun, but really–no dolls I've ever seen look realistic. So I think if the little ones want a doll–any number of different dolls would work great. But I think it best to just buy them books.

I'm pretty sure that wasn't your question.

Nobody who buys/plays with barbie looks like Barbie and 98% will NEVER look like Barbie. Nor do I think my daughter with DS even considers herself as looking different than other children at age 9. She thinks she's beautiful, as she actually is! But, I suspect that she thinks everyone else is beautiful as well - a major part of her beauty. Barbie isn't really even fantasy fr little girls. Little girls/children have beaten up , one eyed, one armed, naked dolls that are loved to death no matter what they look like. But, personally- unless my child really expressed a very focused desire for Barbie I wouldn't buy one DS or not!

I want to thank everyone who commented for expressing your thoughts on this matter. It's clearly something that can provoke a wide range of opinion.

I promised I'd reveal my response, so here it is:

I advised my friend against buying the doll for her granddaughter, because I felt all it would serve to do was emphasis the DS.

In all my posts, on one level or another, I put forward the notion that DS is just one aspect of who my daughter is, and is certainly not the defining aspect. Yes she has DS, but she also has glasses, blue eyes, an incredibly stubborn streak, a love for "Strictly Come Dancing" on TV and so on.

First and foremost, my friend had a new granddaughter. The DS was a secondary issue. I felt that to buy the doll would be to make it a primary issue.

But for all that, I do appreciate many of the thoughts expressed in the comments here. Perhaps in playgroups where there are lots of dolls, then a handful of ones showing physical differences is not a bad thing; perhaps it helps to "normalise" different conditions.

If I was to look for a "Meg" doll for my daughter, I know I'd look for one that had straight blond hair, blue eyes and red glasses. I wouldn't feel the need for it to have a scar on its chest though.

The term "hair-lip" is offensive, just so you know. You could say "cleft affected" or a Barbie with cleft lip or cleft palate. We've actually been looking for a doll of any kind that's cleft affected. My daughter is oh-so-aware that her dolls don't look like her. So if someone gave her a cleft affected doll, I'd be delighted…but I can also understand that some might take that differently.

To come at this from a different perspective, my newest daughter was adopted from Ethiopia and she HATES when people give her "white" looking dolls. Maybe in the end it's just personal preference?

Interesting post!

Spring - my apologies - I had no idea it was an offensive term. Thank you for letting me know - I have now adjusted that bit of text in the post

Thank You!!!

Actually, this post caught my attention because it is a conversation my partner and I had years ago. While I am also not a 'Barbie' fan, far from it, they main reason for this are those Kim had already mentioned (i.e. unrealistic ideal of what is beautiful, etc.). However, if the doll was more diverse (and I mean truly diverse, not just the same doll with darker skin) perhaps I would have been more accepting of the doll. How would I feel if a child of mine was given a doll that resembled them? I would think that would be more respectful and had sincere though behind it than them giving her (or him, what about expanding this idea to Ken, GI Joe, etc.?) a 'Barbie'.

Oh heck yeah!

I looked high and low for a doll with no hair when Peyton was in treatment. I wanted for her to have a doll that she identified with. She didn't want a "baby" doll, she wanted a little girl doll and I couldn't get one. I called the company that makes the "looks like you" dolls and they refused to send me one that was bald, even after I explained why I wanted it. I considered getting one and letting her cut the doll's hair to look like her, but she didn't want that.

I hurt for my little girl who couldn't find a doll that met her heart's desire.

I think a line of special needs dolls is a fantastic idea!! Wheelchairs, cleft palettes, Down's Syndrome, bald…whatever…these kids should have something that represents THEM.

This reminds me of a time when my (typical) daughter went to a BuildABear party (her little sister has Down syndrome and autism). The girl working there didn't stuff one of the bear's legs by accident. I noticed that they actually had wheelchairs for the Bears and I offered to get her one for her bear. Ummmm, she was NOT happy about that idea! So, we got her bear restuffed. I suppose toys are supposed to be ideals and fantasy, and not reality.

Re-reading through all the comments, I think the primary thing about the suitabilty of dolls of the kind we're talking about, is whether the child expresses a desire for one.

It's one thing to yearn to have a doll that has the same special needs as you, but it's quite a different thing to have it thrust upon you.

It's the difference between defining yourself and other people defining you.

Thank you once again to everyone who's commented

I've enjoyed reading all the different viewpoints. Thanks to all for a thought-provoking yet sensitive discussion.