When your kids a beyond the norm, you have to adapt. There is the obvious rigorous schedule of meds, therapy, stretching, speech exercises, feedings and freak out. But there is more.
Over the years, I have noticed that parents of kids with special needs have a common thread with another part of our society. I have known many cops, emergency room personnel, even a couple of medical examiners. We all have a similar sense of humor. There are so many dark words outsiders describe it. Morbid, saturnine, lugubrious. I call it coping.
It’s something that you keep amongst others in your circle of other parents in your situation. We keep the joking about her getting her driver’s license before potty training to the waiting rooms of physical therapy and other “safe” places.
Not long ago I was met with a poor response when I posted this photos on Facebook. I found the caption humorous. We have been struggling with Bear’s weight for years. Her lack of body fat gives her a pale complexion that doesn’t photograph well in most lighting. The look on her face was funny.
She keep me up at all hours and it makes me feel like a zombie. The kid will eat everything put her way and not gain a single ounce. I walk around in a daze. Maybe a change of diet will help us avoid time in the nutritionist clinic. I shrugged off the remarks made on the photo and moved on.
If we can’t find humor in something in our off-the-wall lives, we’ll crumble.
We feel the same way, there are things that are just funny about our kids special needs. It’s not being disrespectful or rude, it’s just the way things are. Like, I bought new curtains for my son’s room, and I noticed that they had Bats on them (Ik*a). Well, my son it totally blind – blind as a Bat as the saying goes!
Or, our plan to dress him up as a pirate, with two eye patches!
I think the picture is funny, and being able to laugh at things is what keeps us sane.
When I suggested dressing her up as a mummy the Halloween right after she learned to walk, my mom yelled at me. She thought I would be mocking my child’s struggle for mobility. I thought a non-verbal kid stomping around wrapped in sheets was hilarious. I still do.
See, we’re taking our kids strengths, and playing to them. She would have made a great Mummy. Maybe, this year
Our daughter is both amazingly beautiful and extremely behaviorally challenged as a result of her cognitive/speech disability; she’s on a couple anti-psychotic meds… so when we started seeing things in the store with the little bunny that said “Cute, but psycho!” we totally thought it fit her and was funny. We bought her a shirt that said it on the back; but we only let her wear it around select people…and even they usually pause half way through reading to look at us with concern while we bust up laughing.
I could really relate to this article. Thanks for the laugh…and the reassurance!
I have twins, and the boy has cerebral palsy. He is almost 3, but still isn’t walking. When we lay him on the ground his legs sit in a way that looks like frog legs, so my husband and I started calling him La Grenouille (which is French for the frog). My mother-in-law hates it! She thinks it’s cruel or we’re making fun of him. We just think it’s funny, and, well…accurate! :c) The irony is, you would think we would be the sensitive ones.
We have to patch Skyler’s eye to strengthen his weaker one (he is legally blind, but sees something, not sure how much yet) and we often joke about him being a pirate. I wanted to dress him up as one of the three blind mice for Halloween.. And I often joke that if he wanders into our room at night and we’re “snuggling” at least he won’t be able to see what’s going on and be traumatized by it. We’ll just have to keep down the volume level since there’s nothing wrong with his hearing.
Oh and one of my kindergarten kids (upon seeing Skyler for the first time) said “He has googly eyes!!” because his eyes cross and wiggle. I couldn’t help but laugh, even though I know I shouldn’t encourage that. Of course the kid wasn’t trying to be mean, he was 5 and I hadn’t quite explained it to him yet. Afterwards he was apologetic.
Yes we do have a different sense of humor but I alway’s say that if I ever quit laughing,I’ll never quit crying.My son like’s to wear his”I’m with crazy” shirt when I’m wearing my”cute but psyho”shirt(He’s autistic and I have a severe anxiety disorder)and my oldest sister is horrified by our idea of funny.
LJ’s therapists and I were just talking about this today. One of the therapists recommended a book and she said, I think you’re ready. I asked her what she meant and she replied that she wouldn’t recommend this book to everyone because not everyone is at that stage. she said some parents still cry when she walks through the door and they would probably hate this book. It’s called My Baby Rides the Short Bus, and I guess it’s a compilation of stories from parents. I can’t wait to read it!