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Rub-A-Dub-Dub…. There Went My Time In The Tub
Once there was a time when I spelled luxury : g-a-r-d-e-n t-u-b. Add a few candles, lots of bubbles, a good book, a bar of homemade soap from my own private recipe, and life was good.
When the hot water cooled, I would drain it off, refill the tub, and repeat as often as I wanted. Ah. The memories. The wonderful, relaxation filled memories.
As part of my ritual, I wouldn't simply just shave my legs. Oh no. I would apply mud mined from exotic locales to my face. And moisturize with oils specifically designed to work miracles on various parts of my anatomy.
Unfortunately, today's reality usually consists of me begging one of my kids to hang out with Parker for five minutes while I attempt to take the edge off of the damage done by exploding ostomy bags, leaking g-tubes, and the best left unidentified globs that get launched from Parker's trach.
My showers don't include enough time to even run a razor over my legs or under my arms. To help rationalize this lack of attention to detail, I tell myself that I am no longer contributing spent razors to the local landfill. Plus the extra layer of fur will help me keep our electricity bill low this winter.
Yup. I'm all about going green and saving the planet.
But in my kids defense, there are times when they come and offer to be on Parker Patrol so I can take a quick shower. This sacrifice on their part also serves as a subtle hint to let me know that they would appreciate not having their Mother embarrass them in front of the friends they just invited over.
I guess Mommy Grunge ain't as hip as it used to be.
Parker's baths, on the other hand, seem to go on forever. Actually, by the time I have wrapped, stuffed, gauzed and bagged all of his various stomas (stomi?) forever is pretty accurate.
Many days though, bath time for Parker works in my favor in unexpected ways. Because of Parker's skill in soaking us both during his tub time, I have been known to count that as my tub time as well.
You may consider that the act of a desperate woman. I call it multi-tasking.
Toe-may-toe. Toe-mah-toe.
Cause at the end of a long and exhausting day, it's the (wishful) thought that counts.
Well, either that or the strength of your deodorant.
You can also find Tammy and Parker hanging out (and trying to catch a quick shower) at their other blog, Praying For Parker.
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Comments on Rub-A-Dub-Dub…. There Went My Time In The Tub »
Rub-A-Dub-Dub There Went My Time In The Tub — Praying For Parker @ 12:27 pm
[...] and I are over at 5 Minutes For Special Needs today where I am dreaming of all the long, relaxing baths I used to have time to indulge in before [...]
Ecki @ 12:37 pm
"I guess Mommy Grunge ain't as hip as it used to be." ROFL! I'm glad it's not just me. My older daughter managed to comment in front of our respite worker "Mom, your legs are spiky!" Gee, thanks. Maybe I'll take the respite time and hide in the shower instead of taking my smart mouth older daughter out to play minigolf this weekend!
Rebecca P @ 1:14 pm
My days of long relaxing baths are long gone as well. I'm so busy these taking care of everyone else these days that I often forget just who I am.
JULIE @ 2:02 pm
It sounds as if you belong to the AMAZON club!!! Many, many posts ago I mentioned that I hadn't shaved my legs – being a mom sometimes has the distinct disadvantage of personal care time. So, I started a club – many bloggy friends joined it . . . we called it CLUB AMAZON! Amazon women do not shave their legs or pits!
Here is hoping you get some alone time!
Stephanie @ 2:59 pm
Oh! You don't even know how much this post describes me! Sometimes I have to stick my head under the faucet for a quick wash just so I can get to the store or the pharmacy! LOL.
Melody @ 3:05 pm
ROTFLOL
And I love hearing that the other moms above are often quite stinky, too. *raises hand to join the masses*
Way to go green, too.
Krystal @ 4:42 pm
lol!!! I am not alone! Praise the Heavens!!
heck, I'm glad if I get a bird bath in – if not, is it time to pull out the baby wipes!!!
Tammy and Parker @ 5:14 pm
Well, I am glad to know that I am in such great company! lol!
And, Julie, can you add another member to your Club Amazon list?
hee,hee
Amy @ 6:08 pm
oh thank goodness I am not the only one going green in the shaving department! haha
great post tammy!
Amy & Emma @ 8:31 pm
I remember baths…
These days I can't even get a shower unless someone else is here, because Miss Emma has decided that she can take care of herself, and I'm likely to come downstairs and find her attempting to make toast or pour juice or (my favorite) figuring out how to work the webcam on my laptop.
Thanks for the grin, Tammy! I've had a long day with a sick child and I seriously needed it.
Michelle @ 10:33 pm
Got such a giggle out of this one, Tammy!
Ken and I have had numerous debates (discussions?) over the proper plural form of stoma – LOL!!
And baths — ah yes, I may have the faintest of memories of what a bath is. Nope — I think I'm confusing them with time spent staring into the super-size cycle of my washer as I top it off with Oxyclean. These day's luxury is 20 seconds to brush my teeth and a non-barfed on T-Shirt…
mum2brady @ 8:07 am
hee hee hee – love it!
Tammy and Parker @ 1:58 pm
Thanks for the comment love everyone. Sometimes it is just nice to be able to look at life with a sense of humor.
Susan (5 Minutes for Mom) @ 2:20 pm
I can relate to forced quick showers… our priorities as moms (and work-at-home-moms) just don't seem to include much personal grooming.
But I can't imagine how much work it must be prepping Parker for a bath!
Brandi @ 4:17 pm
You sweet girl!
I've been reading your blog for awhile now, but this post made me fall in love with your family. That and the incredibly cute picture of Parker with his bath socks on.
What a special family you have!
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